Pagkakataon nga naman

Grabe lang talaga ang nangyayari sa buhay ko. Mula siguro nung October 26.
Sge, October 26. Wala nang pasok ang mga estudyante sa skwelahan, tanging kami nalang ng mga officers ang nag tatambay sa school sapagkat may mga paper works pang kailangan matapos.

Habang ako ay abalang-abala sa pag aayos ng mga gamit...biglang may unknown number ang tumawag sa cellphone ko. Sanay naman ako na kung sino-sinong number ang magtetext sa akin at sanay na rin ako kung sino-sino ang tumatawag sa akin, mapa-english man, tagalog or bisaya ang lingwaheng gamit, sanay na sanay na ako. At lalong sanay din akong hindi sumagot sa mga tawag , lalo na pag may koneksyon sa pagtatrabaho sa eskwelahan.

Nangyaring sinagot ko naman ung tawag. Nagbabakasakaling estudyante na naman, na magtatanong ukol sa mga impormasyong aming ipinapaalam mula pa noong nakaraang linggo. Pero hindi e... nung sinagot ko un, naka bisaya ako. Yun pala, yung kaibigan ko sa fb at textmate ko..tumawag, ah, naki tawag pala. Alam mu yung na touch ako dun??? Nakitawag para lng maka-usap ako. Mula dun, ako ay napa-UY! mukhang iba na talaga motibo nito ah. Di ko alam kung nahalata niya ba yun, pero ang tanging naalala ko lng ay naging masaya ako at na excite dahil nga nakitawag at napatawag siya sa akin habang kami ay nag tetext. Kaya pala bigla nalang nawala.

Noong Sabado, bigla siyang nag-yaya na kumain daw kami dun sa tabing dagat. Natawa ako, na-na excite..Di ko alam kung seryoso ba siya o ano, gusto ko sana, kaya lang di ako handa e. Naka tshirt lng ako at sneakers tapos pawis pa at eye-bagged kase nga dahil sa paper works. Tsaka yung bag ko, masyadong girly, hindi nag match sa pimp na suot ko. Mejo natranta din ako, first meetup eh. Kaya tinawagan ko na. Sabe ko, "oh,ano na..matutuloy ba mamaya?". Alam ko nagulat siya nung tumawag ako,kaya yun..sbe niya "depende sayo, tignan mo oh maulan". "Text lng mamaya",sabe ko.

Tapos ayun. mga 5:30 ng hapon, nagtext siya na matutuloy. Ako naman,syempre babae dude diba. Conscious masyado, lalo na sa hitsura, nako talaga. Nagtanung tanung pa ako sa mga kaklase ko kung ano dapat gesture ko, ano gagawin ko, yung buhok ko--okay ba. Yung suot ko at bag ko, ayos ba. Lahat na! Yung tipong alam mo na, first impression counts diba. Lalo na siya, alam ko bago lng yun naligo kasi umuwi ng bahay.

Sabe niya mga 6:00 ng gabi siya lalakad. Ako nasa school lng nun e, so ayos lng. Habang wala pa sa oras, nagsasasayaw kami ng mga kaklase ko. Nagloko loko , kaya ayun pawis! Grabe! Nung gabi na talaga, pinaalis na kami sa office kasi i-lo-lock na ng janitor. Pero bago yun, nagtext sina Mama kung saan daw ako dahil sabay daw kami uuwi. Di ako nagreply kaagad, ksi nga may lakad ako.

Pagbabang-pagbaba ko sa hagdan. Naka OK na ako sa kaibigan ko. At BOOM!!! Hello sundo! ayun, ang epal lang, andun sina Mama sa sasakyan, hinintay lang naman ako. Sabay daw kami uuwi. Wala naman akong ibang ma rason, eh kase sa school lng naman talaga yung mga gawain ko at wala na akong ibang ma rason dahil kumpleto na ang grades ko. Wala na, pasado na lahat, wala nang kailangan mag comply.

Kaya bigla akong napa text at misscall sa kaibigan ko. "NAH OI" "DITO SINA MAMA,SINUSUNDO NA NILA AKO" at nakatanggap lng ako ng isang "wtf" na reply. Ayun, para sa akin, may next time pa naman siguro. Ayaw pa ata ni Lord na magkita kami.

Kinagabihan, mga 9:30, tumawag yung lalaki. Eh, kasi nga diba, I have strict parents and maliit lng bahay namin, kaya kung may tumawag sa cellphone mo, maririnig ng lahat ang pinag uusapan niyo. Ayun, lumabas ako, buti tulog lahat. Tapos ayun, sinagot ko yung tawag (which is very ironic,kasi di naman talaga ako sumasagot ng tawag sa bahay---nagtaka nga ako bat ko sinasagot tawag niya e,lagot talaga ako pag nahuli ako) sabe niya nakapagbihis na daw siya nun, ready na daw siya nun. And worst! Magkikita na daw sana kami dahil pupunta na siyang Zamboanga. At parang dun na yata siya mag-aaral. Matagal pa daw siya babalik. PARANG ANG MALAS LANG DIBA?? Sabik na ako nun e.

Naiyak pa ako ng konti pagkatapos ng tawag nun e. 4am daw sila aalis. D ko matiis ang pag-alala ko, di ako nakatulog ng husto. At nagtxt ako na magpaalam siya ng maayos bago sila bumyahe. Ayun....

Nako, antok na ako. Matutulog na muna :) Good Night!

-Watch Out for Part II-

Crazy 9th of October '12

Today had really been a crazy tough day for me. Like really, I feel so unhealthy yet so boombastically hype until the end of the night. Just so, we were blocking and unblocking students from their clearances, it's so tiring you know. But hella found a way out to ease boredom and stress from work which is actually entertaining people who would come and ask for help inside the EC office. Oh well, I like this freshman guy and like, their attendance/passbook were surrendered and I was running over the pictures in each passbook, I didn't notice `em. He's not even that attractive, but yeah, it turned out that when he claimed his passbook... It was actually that guy I have been fantasizing--- not seriously but seemingly admiring to the fact that he somehow makes my day, not often but yeah. So I asked JM to get his digits, it was written on the passbook. Oh well, I couldn't imagine myself why I did that. Perhaps, I call that freshman guy as Mr.Freshie Fresh Fresh :))I'm single now and I can do what I want! Free from anything LOL. But did you even know what confuses me right now? It's that Earl guy from STI. Just before we often kept in touch, I already had a crush on him when I saw him from a far at the mall, outside the cinema 4. But `twas nothing to me, he was catchy, and all, you know my type: azn-ish,swagger, hair stylish-ishish. I took a step backward,paused and grabbed the hand of my girl friend. LOL. And so we went watching the large posters of what was showing to random cinemas and he was actually looking!!! (that awkward feeling when you feel that he's looking at you when he's really not and you're just in a paranoia, `twas just a mere imagination like the animes haha). Moving on, when I went home, my sister asked me if I went to the mall and if I saw a guy with an azn-ish bleached hair wearing this shade of shirt. And I was like,"oh.. the guy of my dreams!!! How did you know??" -- Then my sister responded, "My friend saw you." "Seriously? who?" "That guy with a bleached hair, bla bla bla" "What? really? wow, I never knew that sort of guy existed in this city LOL" Everything was nothing to me, and after four months or so. The guy was too active commenting stuffs on my facebook. You could probably say he's annoying, but really, to me he's fun to deal with. And eventually we chatted, shared several songs to each other and there came to a point when he said... "Aye, i must be going, just text me." I was like, "No, you text me!" He said: "Oh, you never reply." Secretly, I was thinking (Oh really? did I read it right? I never reply? LOL. it was because, I'm used to receiving messages with unknown numbers. Maybe he was one of them and left ignored LOL.) After a while, I got a text message from him. He was being so childish, and sweet. From then on, there was never a day we failed to have a conversation. If not through text, just thru facebook chat and he updates me to where he currently is, what's his doing, everything. He's getting mushy and now, we sorta act like couples because sometimes he gets mad... and I'm like "we're not even on, why would I even comfort or do whatever to make em feel better??" Everything confuses me right now. He's a friend of my sista and I have a pretty feeling they got "something" before me. Before the guy confessed to me that he's having a crush on me and eventually after two weeks I told him I got a crush on him. Though I told em I never saw em. He kept tellin me he's fat,pimpled dark-short man. Only thing was f'sho.. He's short and probably we could be a great couple!! LOL. Really, I don't want to jump into conclusions right now. Everything seems to be really twirly unstable. Because after my first ever ultimate martyr break-up, after finally leaving my long distance boyfriend which I'm proud to say that we have been on and off for 16 months and eventually, I got tired of his effortless doings _<. LOL, really. Life is fun! Life is colorful :3 Meet my internet crush: ♥ ❤ ❥ ❣ ❦ ❧

Hello Nineteen

Hello nineteen! Hey, it's been a while since I last visited here. One week passed my birthday and I just couldn't believe that I am on the last year of my teenage life.. NINETEEN. Sounds quite old enough.. But anyway, I thank God for every single blessing he have been showering upon me up to this point. He has been very good to me all these times and I just could stop thanking Him for all these blessings I have now. The people around me are yet so warm, they greet me with their smiling joyous faces every time we meet at the hallway at school, even I do not know exactly each of their names, but they are all so good to me. I'm just simply happy that God put me to this kind of situation in my life right now, I somehow wanted it to be like this. Like giving and sharing smiles to the people and informing the crowd that this is what's going to happen in our society, our school,our college.. I like to be the source of information and being a reliable source is my happiness to make others feel updated.

I have never been so active in school activities. Well, I have been performing since my kindergarten years, I was the one who beat the National Anthem during graduation and I was a folk dancer ever since in elementary but I was drowned to the deepest of my shame when I was in high school since everyone was very excellent and all I did was to observe and I felt so small and noob. But anyway! God is still so great and good to me. I have been exercising my capabilities now and I'm proud for what I am worth living for. That is to serve thy Lord and to serve the people who needs me. I love the people around me right know, I don't care if they are all fake or real to me, as long as I live my day completely and happily, though not that much contented in life, I want so much in life, that's out of reach---but I still know my limits, all those are dreams that are for free and nothing beats each one's imagination. I'm learning to still keep my feet on the ground every opportunity and success I take a step higher and lifts my head a bit higher too, but for all I know, I wouldn't be like this if not for the plans of God and my perseverance as well as the pressure and advises from my family especially the dictator of my life, my best father. The best thing to do is to dream high and aim high but still keeping one's feet on the ground leaves a legacy for who and what you are.

Since I'm nineteen now. I'm big enough to handle hmmm tricky stuffs. I need to grow up, like I need to be good at my house chores since I will be leaving home in the next couple of weeks, I will be going to Cebu for four days and three nights. That's what I'm excited for. I was given a condition weather to go with my blockmates for the said field trip or not. If I won't be going, I will be given plain cash,tax free--and that would add on my allowance for trip to Manila next year to visit my friends and friends of friends since my Unnie and I had dealt that we need to go to Manila together by 2013. But oh well, first things first. I go for Cebu first and save up for Manila next year.

I just can't help comparing myself sometimes---to others, like someone better than me,prettier than me,physically or whatever. One thing I could conclude to all these over-thinking session of mine : There will always be someone better than me out there and all I need is a person who doesn't even care about that. And I need not to say sorry for how I feel,when I say something towards another person, because it's like saying sorry for being real. I am who I am and I don't care if you possess something negative about me, we all live ones life and if you're not contented about yours, then get a life!

Couple of weeks ago, I was about to give up. I saw my sis' facebook page and her quote was something like "surrender when you need to" and I was like,just so wowed about that statement because I understood it in an emotional way. Like, hello LDRs like this and that and I still won't give up until I proved myself what is it like even though LDRs are hard as they say, but yeah, there are alot more ways to keep in touch with the ones you love, there's God,put trust and let him enter the center of our lives. Because the success of a person all depends on who leaves it up to God (with perseverance).

One Step Closer

So today marks one of the most memorable and important day of my life. No,it's not my birthday, but I have come to realize that Luke 11:9 So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.---I could clearly relate to what I have been experiencing now.

And if you don't know, I have been having a long distance relationship with a guy whom I really don't know,I just fell inlove with his personality,like really. He's not even that much expressive or whatever you expect a gentleman could be,like really.Well,anyway just leave it to me.No need to explain why I love that guy. For love has no definite reason :)

So he got my present already!!! And I'm just so dying happy that he showed up in Luneta to pick those up from my "cuzzy". My cuzzy's family have been very supportive, yet there was a kind of drama that went on lately. I actually asked my cuzzy a favor,where infact my bf and him never really have a connection, and both our parents are strict when it comes to our love life that's why we need to cover up. Pretending that he was a college classmate of my cuzzy was the catch. My cuzzy described him as a six-footer korean-ish,swagger-ish,just my type. And Iif could get to see him, I'd definitely fall and knock myself off ten times than the usual. Shhhh,I'm so kileg & purely happy. A gift that is made up of love & care,blood & sweat---too many people involved making those for three months. I'm pretty sure he's happy & realized how much I love him--for real & no doubt. I'd be a fool to let that guy go.

But I really wonder if he'd get to see me. What to wear? How should I look? How to act? Like really, I couldn't even tell my mother about all these since he's a total stranger to my family. Above all, I surrender everything to God. He's given me a guy,more than enough. I'll see him as soon as I get there. Hopefully. Amen.

I B E L I E V E